Wednesday, 17 December 2014

LET'S TALK: Things I've Learned in 2014

 
I started my Let's Talk posts in May of this year - I realised my blogging in 2014 had felt a lot more honest and I found it really easy to type out my feelings and share them with you. Although my first Let's Talk was a travel related one, I decided once I returned from gallivanting around the world that it was a 'feature' I would include on Unorganised Chaos every now and then. I've read a few posts recently of people reviewing their years and it got me thinking - 2014 has been a BIG year for me - so what has this year taught me?

1. Being alone doesn't mean being lonely - For years I've felt like I always needed company - whether that be a friend, a boyfriend, my family. This year I lived 6 months on the other side of the world, I've had a break up, I moved back in with my parents (twice), I moved out (twice) and I've taken a risk on a new job. It's only this year that I've really felt I can be alone without feeling lonely. I have found a sense of independence and enjoy my own company.

2. Your own happiness should be put first - I have never believed this more than I do right now. People always seem to say if you try and please other people too much that you stop pleasing yourself - it's true. Going travelling allowed me to be selfish and to enjoy myself, coming home meant I had a fresh mind and new goals.

3. Don't overthink everything - sometimes you just need to say yes instead of weighing all the consequences. I blogged in 2012/13 I blogged about being a Yes Woman and more recently I spoke about knowing when to just go for it - sometimes, you have to take a chance. It could be the best thing to happen to you or it could be, well, not so good but if you overthink everything and don't say yes sometimes, you might spend a lot of time thinking 'what if?'

4. Trust your gut instinct - it's usually right. I always used to think my gut instinct was just anxiety and I was my own worst enemy at overthinking things (not taking my own advice from 3.) but you know yourself when something is wrong. I made a decision that lasted about a week - I had known for months it wasn't right but I still did it anyway BUT I soon trusted my gut instinct and it's lead to this year ending on a massive high for me.

5. Don't be with somebody you want to change - if you were meant to be with that person, you wouldn't want aspects of them to change. I have realised this the hard way but now I'm enjoying not having that kind of worry.

6. Don't settle - not just in relationships but in life - don't just plod along waiting for something good to happen to you; go out there and get it through hard work and determination.

7. Be confident in yourself - I guarentee you that you will have more going for you than you think even on those rough days where you feel like somebody's always better than you.

8. Don't be afraid to speak your mind - similarly to not settling - don't just put up with something because you want an easy life, because you think that's all you deserve or because 'that's the way it is' - you deserve way more!

9. Not knowing is sometimes more fun - when I left to go travelling in 2013, I had no idea what was in store for me, of course, that was a little daunting but seriously, not knowing where I would be in a fortnight, not having a plan for the week...it was a lot of fun. You don't always need to have everything planned in advance - quite often the spontaneous things are the most fun.

10. Give yourself a bloody break - in terms of rest, in terms of beating yourself up over something and, most importantly, if you fall off the bandwagon of a goal you've set yourself, think of it as a blip and the next day is a brand new one to get back up again!

11. It's okay to not be at the same job/relationship/travel/life stage as everybody else -we all have different beginnings, middles etc. - people like me have several different beginnings. I've read SO many posts/articles this year on having quarter life crisis', twenties problems etc. We all do things differently - some of us graduate, get a job, decide we hate that job/boyfriend/life and go travelling before coming home and landing on your feet, some get a job, get engaged, get married, have kids - it's all okay -  there's no 'Rule Book of Life' for us to follow.

12. Similarly to 11, DO NOT wish your life was somebody else's - Just because you see everybody's best moments on social media, it does not mean their life is peachy. If you step back, appreciate the little things and make the most of what you do have, you'll realise you've got it pretty darn good. I had a moment recently where I questioned why I blog because I starting feeling a tad of jealousy towards more successful bloggers - but, let's face it, my own life is pretty peachy most of the time, why would I wish I had somebody else's?

13. Money isn't everything - sometimes experiences completely outweigh that - travelling stole all of my savings and more, but it was without a doubt the best thing I've ever done AND a real turning point for me as a person.

14. Don't live day to day thinking 'I wish I could do that', 'I'm jealous I'm not doing that', 'you're so lucky' - go out and grab the things you want. If you want a hot chocolate, go and get one, if you want to jump out of a plane, jump out of a god damn plane (parachute attached, of course). Don't think 'I'm still young, I have the rest of my life' because before you know it, years will have passed and you'll wonder where those years went that you spent wishing you had done this and that.

15. It's not about the amount of friends you have, how often you see them...it's about the ones that get you, the new friends you meet who love the things you love and the ones you see every couple of months and it's like you saw each other yesterday.

16. A bad day doesn't have to become a bad week - Negativity is something I've tried to eliminate as much as possible this year and I've realised that being in a terribly bad mood one day is something that you should avoid carrying on to the next day as much as possible. Call it a day, get some sleep and wake up refreshed and positive for a brand new day.

17. Don't be afraid to take a chance, it might lead to something amazing - say yes a little bit more. If it doesn't pay off, chalk it up to experience and new opportunities will undoubtedly be just around the corner.

What have you learnt this year that you are taking with you into 2015? Tell me in the comments below!

xo

4 comments:

  1. Great post! Everyone makes resolutions at the end of the year and it basically becomes a time of being so intent on bettering yourself that you focus entirely on your current flaws as opposed to your past achievements. I love the idea of looking back over the year and acknowledging the things you've done right or what you've come away with :)

    I especially agree with trusting my gut instinct... sometimes I get this overwhelming feeling that something is just so not right for me; I used to push past it thinking that things would get better and that 'gut feelings' aren't anything to go by (often ending in disaster come to think of it!) but now I totally listen to my instincts and I truly think it's made me a happier person.

    Tom :) Daydream in Blue

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    1. I'm so pleased to hear that Tom :) here's to a great 2015, ey! xo

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  2. What a fantastic year for you! It seems you learned a lot of really great things :) I have trouble with the whole "figuring out what I want" thing, because, I find, I want so many things. And unfortunately I cant have all of them. This year its between using my savings to travel, or buy a house... I've chosen house.

    One thing I learned this year: there don't necessarily have to be "the right or wrong" decision. Decisions can just be right for different reasons.

    -Alex

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    1. I think we all do Alex - I can guarantee I'll probably un-figure things out haha!
      And that is such a good thing to have learned - it makes life that little bit easier when you bear that in mind, doesn't it? xo

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